April 5, 2009

This is really happening!

Yikes! This is really happening isn't it? I'm really going to try to make a baby! I didn't think I'd ever say type those words again. It gives me goosebumps just thinking about it. I ordered some preseed yesterday. My husband has no idea what that is, and I'm not going to fill him it. It would make him all nervous and crazy! I'm just going to keep that little nugget to myself and let him think it's for "having fun"! LOL

I'm not going to lie, I wonder how this is going to feel if it doesn't happen, but I'm surprisingly optimistic. We are not going to try forever. My hubby is getting up there in age and doesn't want to be 70 when our baby graduates. I also lost a fallopian tube during my surgery, so right off the bat our chances are cut in half. I am a very religious person and I truely believe that if we were meant to have a baby, we will have one. If we weren't, we won't. I'm fully prepared to accept either.

But I can't stop myself from thinking, this time next year I'll have a new baby.

6 comments:

Raising Davis Darlings said...

Keep thinking those happy thoughts!!! Being relaxed helps.

Jen said...

If you and I had anymore in common it would be eerie! I only have one fallopian tube, too! I only have my left one~ which one do you have?

Crazy!

Infertile Myrtle said...

I'm a lefty!

CREEPY!

Aunt Becky said...

Squee! I'm so excited for you!

Amy, queen of the world. said...

OH! It's you!! I'm SO excited to hear that you're TTC!!!! EEEEE that made my day. Anyway, you're right, kids shouldn't even HAVE to grasp the concept of death. We had an emergency staff meeting today (and have another tomorrow) just so we could grieve together, pray, cry, etc... and WE don't understand why it happened, and we definitely don't want to wrap our heads around the fact that the baby won't ever be back at school, so I can only imagine what it will be like for the kids. :(

Erica said...

Awwwwe... I'm so happy that you are thinking that way... Its VERY hard to think that if God wants you to have another baby- it will happen!

Preseed is a nifty little invention :-)

Here's to hoping for a positive test soon!